Blogs - Destructive or constructive for relationships
My classmate and I were having this short debate on friday.
He was commenting that blogs can be a destructive factor in relationships in general.
Reasons being, given if A has a blog and has some grievances against B and A is very expressive and emotional and writes an entry about B. C reads entry, tells B and B is becomes aware of A's true feelings and B falls out with A because of what is written on the blog.
Offering my viewpoints on this matter:
1) Purpose of the blog
2) Maturity of the parties involved
3) Importance of relationship to both parties
Blog is a daily log of events around a person's life. Intimate thoughts and viewpoints are often shared "openly" in this "private" space on the internet. So knowing how to draw the line and when to draw the line is important.
Eg.
Maturity can also be seen clearly on how B would handle the conflict with A after B stumbles upon A genuine feelings. If B had enough maturity, instead of falling out with A, B could confront A with the right mindset of salvaging a friendship. If what A said makes a point, it would mean that B would have to work on areas of character flaws and this would make B a better person at the end of the day. (Point is this: No one is perfect.)
Importance of relationship to both parties - If you are not of importance to me why should I care about what you say?
Which brought the discussion to another related topic : What happens if people whom you consider as friends are gossiping about your life behind your back after reading your blog?
My answer: People will always talk. Speculations are unavoidable. That explains why tabloids are always in business no matter how bad the recession hit the economy. If they are so accurate on their speculations, they might as well become full time stock investors and speculate the stock market and be a billionaire at the end of the day? Won't that be better?
So why bother? Just be true to yourself and those that are true to you will accept you for who you are, instead of judging you based on a narrative entry which viewpoints are obviously biased towards the author?
End of the day, it still varies from individual to individual.
People should learn to see that there's not just one shade of gray, but many shades of gray. There's never an absolute "right" choice simply because there's always more than 1 "right" choice and people should learn to see each other's "right" choices. Life with its uncertainties can turn the "right" choices into "wrong" choices and vice versa, bearing this is mind, is there an absolute equation/law that can be applied to derived at a common final answer?
Life was never designed to work out this way: 3x+5y=z²
summarised in a standard equation that will give us the same answer whenever we apply the laws.
Lastly to all bloggers out there : keep in mind of who is reading, what they are reading, how they are reading.
Knowledge is the first step towards protecting interests.
Cheers,
PpD
He was commenting that blogs can be a destructive factor in relationships in general.
Reasons being, given if A has a blog and has some grievances against B and A is very expressive and emotional and writes an entry about B. C reads entry, tells B and B is becomes aware of A's true feelings and B falls out with A because of what is written on the blog.
Offering my viewpoints on this matter:
1) Purpose of the blog
2) Maturity of the parties involved
3) Importance of relationship to both parties
Blog is a daily log of events around a person's life. Intimate thoughts and viewpoints are often shared "openly" in this "private" space on the internet. So knowing how to draw the line and when to draw the line is important.
Eg.
- Stating a clause in your blog: Thoughts and opinions are only valid at the current time of entry. It may or may not be valid in future, at any point of time other than time captured on blog entry. Every entry is written for the author's reference. The author has the right to exercise the freedom of speech.
- Blog readers do not know the author. So criticisims on what is "right" and "wrong" is subjective to each individual.
- Making a conscious effort not to name people out (if you really have something very very bad to say about them)
- Don't go into details on things that you don't want the whole world to know. (if you really have to say it then do so in a manner that only you will know what you are talking about and others won't even have a clue.)
- If you have to bitch about someone, be upfront about it. Make it known to your readers that this entry is soley for bitching purposes to vent negative emotions.
Maturity can also be seen clearly on how B would handle the conflict with A after B stumbles upon A genuine feelings. If B had enough maturity, instead of falling out with A, B could confront A with the right mindset of salvaging a friendship. If what A said makes a point, it would mean that B would have to work on areas of character flaws and this would make B a better person at the end of the day. (Point is this: No one is perfect.)
Importance of relationship to both parties - If you are not of importance to me why should I care about what you say?
Which brought the discussion to another related topic : What happens if people whom you consider as friends are gossiping about your life behind your back after reading your blog?
My answer: People will always talk. Speculations are unavoidable. That explains why tabloids are always in business no matter how bad the recession hit the economy. If they are so accurate on their speculations, they might as well become full time stock investors and speculate the stock market and be a billionaire at the end of the day? Won't that be better?
So why bother? Just be true to yourself and those that are true to you will accept you for who you are, instead of judging you based on a narrative entry which viewpoints are obviously biased towards the author?
End of the day, it still varies from individual to individual.
People should learn to see that there's not just one shade of gray, but many shades of gray. There's never an absolute "right" choice simply because there's always more than 1 "right" choice and people should learn to see each other's "right" choices. Life with its uncertainties can turn the "right" choices into "wrong" choices and vice versa, bearing this is mind, is there an absolute equation/law that can be applied to derived at a common final answer?
Life was never designed to work out this way: 3x+5y=z²
summarised in a standard equation that will give us the same answer whenever we apply the laws.
Lastly to all bloggers out there : keep in mind of who is reading, what they are reading, how they are reading.
Knowledge is the first step towards protecting interests.
Cheers,
PpD
posted by A Shade of Purple at 9:42 AM
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